Saturday, October 14, 2006

Reasons Why I Avoid Friday The 13th Like The Plague

1. Having the responsibility to snap the wedding pictures of your friend but getting stuck in traffic on the way and arriving with a second to spare. In the meantime, the only thought while en-route to the wedding is "Oh MY God, We Will Never Make It and Linda Will Not Have Photographs Of What Is Probably The Most Important Day Of Her Life".

2. Rushing to get out the car and placing a large hole in your panty- hose.

3. Trying to hide the hole in your panty-hose and making it worse.

4. Literally throwing Bill and his camera out of the car and leaving to find a drug-store in the area to replace the panty-hose.

5. Getting six blocks from the wedding hall and realizing you have "No Cash" because at the last minute, you changed your "Gold handbag" for the matching "Black handbag" and never placed your wallet inside it.

6. Returning to the hall at the height of the ceremony and seeing Bill standing outside instead of being inside snapping those pictures.

7. Having Bill tell you that his camera was "Dead as A Door-Nail" and I upon leaving in a rush to buy "un-bought" panty hose left the second camera in the car.

Conclusion to all this;

1. I screamed like a hyena being cooked alive over a hot open flame in an outside fireplace.

2. I missed part of the ceremony of my friend.

3. Spent the entire evening wearing stockings with a hole in them.

Future Thought;

1. Never to attend a Friday the 13th wedding again and if another one of my friends even thinks about choosing that "Black Fairy" day to wed, take a stick and beat it over their head until they change their mind. (Hope you are listening Melissa)

Oh And Another Thing;

1. Take an extra pair of panty-hose to your own wedding in case you get a hole.

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