Almost Home

I am currently back in Pa., not at my home, but at my parents' home in Washington Crossings. We came back early because my own mother had such severe shin pain that she ended up in the hospital in California. After leaving California to Houston Texas and back to Philadelphia and the drive up to Washington Crossings, we got here about 1:15am. Mom was unable to walk and was taken by wheelchair through all airports. Today, she will see her own doctor. her bone pain has been excruciating. Nothing is working and that includes narcotics. Dad left at 5am to drive to the Northern shores to take Uncle Gene to the doctor for bloodwork. I will be glad to see him back home, so I can go home. When we left Uncle Jack, he was to undergo another procedure on the amputee leg.

This has been an experience. It also had me thinking alot about things. Two uncles sick, one on death's door and now my own mother experiencing similar symptoms. When I walked into her bedroom I saw a painting hanging on her wall and I immediately took a second glance. It so resembles my granddaughter, I really thought it was her. Same face, eyes, lips, color hair, curly hair and the girl in the painting could be five years old. It was not her, but a painting my mom purchased years before my granddaughter was even born. I no longer discuss J or A with my son. I set that boundary before I left for California. Any conversation I have with my son is about everything but those two people. It is not fair to place him in any middle situation and it creates anxiety within both of us. J has the ball, J makes the decision. My relationship with A has nothing to do with my relationship with my son and that is how I am keeping it. I left the ball in J's court. Thus far, no response. I also set a boundary that I will not make contact with J unless J makes contact with me. I am not going to break that boundary.

It is time to take care of me. It is my time.

I have a few more pictures to post when I get back to my own place tonight of taking off from Orange County airport and landing in Houston Airport in addition to a cool diner in the Houston Airport. If uncle Jack passes, I will not return for the funeral. I said, my goodbyes, saw my cousins and aunt, enjoyed some sights. When I return to California, it will be with my husband. I flew so much this year that I want to remain local for a bit. I was on ten flights since March. I have been to England, Italy, Chicago, New Orleans, Texas. I have been to the Great Wolf Lodge, the Woodlands and the shores of Wildwood and Cape May. I graduated. I worked. I did my share of caretaking.

It is my time. It is now up to others.