On a Jet Plane

The mums are blooming. The dark purple one is especially beautiful. Tonight, I will meet up with my mother at the airport Hilton for a very early flight to California tomorrow morning. Marianne will meet us at the airport in the morning. We will be staying at the Hilton in San Juan Capistrano, and I am not sure of their Internet access, but I am bringing my laptop anyway. The flight will be long because there is no direct flights to Orange County Airport. We have a layover in Chicago to and a layover in Houston on the way back. Marianne is staying until Tuesday. I am staying with my Mother the entire week or more. Uncle Jack is going home on Hospice and since Mom has been living out of a suitcase for two months between Uncle Jack and Uncle Gene, she is fried. She helps everyone else. Her daughters are now going to help her.

My Uncle and Aunt live in Capistrano, so we will be close by. My cousin Eric is flying in from New Mexico and my cousin Matt is flying in from Texas. I am not sure about John in Hawaii, since he was just in or Paul in Colorado. My family is large and this is our norm. We are there for each other.

My session with David was good yesterday. I have to admit since I began working with him, I feel so much better about myself. He is pleased with my progress. Since I started working with him, I learned three very important factors to apply to my life and since I have applied them, I feel so much freedom. First, I may feel responsible but I am not responsible. Second, the importance of establishing emotional boundaries and not allow other people's issues take space up in my head. Third, the only decisions I am responsible for are my own. I am not responsible for other people's choices, and when a child becomes an adult, they are responsible for their own decisions and if they make a poor choice, hopefully they learn from it. Their poor choices does not mean bad parenting.

Since my stress level has been reduced, my creativity level has increased. I am not grieving losses anymore, but looking towards the future. I have not had a nightmare since I started seeing David. I am actually doing genealogy with my daughter-in-law and having great fun with it. We spent a good deal of last night chatting back and forth about the things we uncovered in the Weihe family. When I get back from California, I am going to take her on a cemetery hike. She created her own website for genealogy and it is really good. One of the things, we discovered is there is a strong German background and her ancestors built the California RailRoads in the 1800's.

Today, I want to get my hair done and pack. I think I will try and sleep a bit, since I still do not sleep well. The best decision I made was taking a five week hiatus from work. I did not realize had much I needed it.