Saturday, November 26, 2011

Woodlands Inn and Resort

One of the reasons we like to come to the Woodlands is because they have the biggest Hot Tub, we have ever seen. It has fountains and is the size of a regular indoor pool. True to form, we left the house packed with everything except swim suits. You would think it would be the first thing packed with all the talking we did about the Hot Tub. Nooooooo. We forgot them. Try buying one in the North section of the country in Winter. Boots. Yes. Swim suits. No. Not happening. However, I managed to pick up a pair of biker shorts and a workout shirt. Perfect. Bill found some sort of Penn State shorts. We were good to go now.

The Hot Tub at this place is well worth a trip in itself. A huge warm bath tub with water flowing over the fountains into the pool. Relaxation. Peace. I almost fell asleep in the tub. The last time we were here we stayed in the tower. This trip we got a room with a balcony overlooking the babbling flowing stream. The sound alone can sooth any insomniac into a deep sleep.

The best part is I get points for free nights anywhere in the country just for staying here. Last year's points got us a night in Lancaster to visit Dutch Wonderland's Christmas Land with the grandkids. I believe the points I received will probably go towards a room in St. Augustine Florida or New Orleans next summer.

Anywho, (my own word)

This year we had a fantastic anniversary. We ate Thanksgiving at a Japanese Restaurant and had Hibachi Turkey. We discovered hidden lakes and dams and took in the beauty of our surroundings. It felt as though I feel in love with my husband all over again. We had champagne and music. We talked and cuddled and for the first time in a very long time, I felt happy. Happy. What a word! Happy with one person, my husband. A thoughtful giving man who is not afraid to show emotion, but strength at the same time. Someone who will be there for me (and I can be difficult) and a love I can always count on. After five years, he has my entire heart. What took me so long?

As far as the Woodlands, it has two on site resturants and a lounge. The resort has an indoor and outdoor pool along with its huge Hot Tub. It is located along a babbling brook and has transportion to a local casino if you are interested in gambling. The front desk service was great and because our second night happened to be the room next to a couple who were obvious very drunk and fought from 4am until 9am, we received that night free of charge. I was grateful and it proved to me they are serious about pleasing the customer. This was our second trip here and it will not be our last. The beds were comfortable with down comforters and pillows and products were all from the spa. Highly recommend a visit here.

Friday, November 25, 2011

What a Perfect Anniversary Present

Bill bought me this charm bracelet to wear in remembrance of my granddaughter. I hope that one day I can pass it on to her, but for now she will remain a part of me even if it is her name dangling from my wrist.

Happy 5th Anniversary

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Wednesday, November 09, 2011

Jaded

Never even heard the term until Steven Tyler sang that one song in regards to his daughter. I am feeling jaded. It sucks. Life goes on. I have decisions to make now that I have more information available to me.  What do I tell my granddaughter when she grows up and asks why I did not fight for her? Or. What do I tell my granddaughter when she grows up and she asks why I created pain for her mother? What do I tell her? I would love to see her. I do not believe that is the cards. It has been four months of silence. I wonder if a long distance relationship is possible where I talk with her on the phone and send cards and gifts at holidays and birthdays? I know things cannot continue like this. How do I let go? Should I let go? The fighter in me says, "Hell No". Then, there is that other part that does not want to create grief and pain.

I grew up with my paternal side of the family living blocks away, which included my great grandmother. I never knew them. It was not until I grew up and researched my family history that I discovered the Schroeders lived all around me. I asked one of my great aunt's who was still alive, why had the family not fought for me, visited me, included me in their lives? How could my grandmother Marie be one of sixteen children and not one of those children took an interest in me knowing my father was in the military and my paternal grandparents were dead? My great grandmother, Marie's mother, died in March of 1979. I was 19 years old and never knew her. That is sad. Really sad. As a child, it is the parents responsibility to include people in their lives, because children cannot make that decision. I knew my maternal side of the family. My grandmother was an only child who's own mother died when she was 3 yrs old. I knew my uncles and my aunt. They lived around us too. However, no one ever said a word about the others who were also so close. I am sure it had something to do with my father and mother divorcing and my father spending 27 years in the Navy. I will never really know the truth. But I can tell you from experience, I felt the loss.

It seems as though, history is about to repeat itself with my granddaughter. What am I to do? I am not her mother. I am not her father. I am her paternal grandmother who loves this child beyond words and I feel like no matter what, the choice is going to be wrong. I wish that some compromise could be made. However, I do not have that power. That power belongs to someone else.

Sunday, November 06, 2011

Sunday

I have posted a few more diary excerpts but I warn anyone who is about to read them that the posts may create emotions one may not want to deal with. They were hard for me to post.

Today, Shaun, Trish and the boys are coming over for dinner so the rib roast with tiny potatoes and baby carrots is in the slow cooker. For dessert we have a chocolate creme bistro cake and of course there is ice cream. Thursday, I have a date with my younger son. I have to work next weekend so I am off on Thursday.

Tuesday, November 01, 2011

Chatty Patty

Who would have thought that I would be living in a highrise condo out of the city and shopping at Whole Foods? Yeah. I can't believe it myself. I still feel like I am on vacation. I mean I have someone running to open the door to the building everytime I come and go. That is the man's job. Open and close doors for residents. I am starting to add a few decorative accents throughout the place. I am packing away most of the family photos. I am just keeping a few out of my grandkids and kids. I have three containers of Christmas decorations stored away. I have no intention of decorating for any holiday this year. Shaun and Trish have taken over the annual family Christmas Eve Open House. I was glad to hand it over to them after 33 years of doing it. Thanksgiving I hope to be away somewhere.

Most of family is now aware of my health issues. No news yet. But surgery is in my future. I know I need to schedule it but have not. Pain grows worse but it does not stop me from doing anything. I work long hours. I shop. I clean. I drink my wine. The thing is I am not afraid. I have no fear at all. 2011 will go down as the worst year of my life. I have dealt with a lot of adversity throughout my life and have gone through some very rough times, but all of that is nothing compared to what I had to face this year. So many losses in such a short time. So much emotional pain that the physical pain means nothing. I don't know. I have always tried my best. Sometimes, one's best is not good enough. I can't think about that now. I will think about that tomorrow.


My Grandsons

Halloween 2011