Sunday, April 29, 2012

Bernard & Mary Boland Cafferty's Daughter

Name:Mary McCaffarty
Birth Date:1909
Birth Place:PA
Death Date:3 Sep 1910
Death Place:Philadelphia, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Age at Death:1 year 3 days
Burial Date:6 Sep 1910
Street Address:5 Saboratory 38th ward
Cemetery:Holy Sepulchre
Marital Status:Single
Father:Bernard McCaffarty
Father's Birth Place:Ireland
Mother:Mary Boland
Mother's Birth Place:Ireland
FHL Film Number:

Spelling is incorrect on death record. It was Cafferty and not McCaffarty.

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Name:Mary Pester
Birth Date:1914
Birth Place:Phila
Death Date:8 Feb 1914
Death Place:Phiadelphia, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Age at Death:1 day
Burial Date:9 Feb 1914
Father:Robert Pester
Father's Birth Place:New York
Mother:Annie McCafferty
Mother's Birth Place:Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
FHL Film Number:1429017


Does one need to forgive in order to move on in life? I am often asked this question and my answer may surprise you. I do not believe that one must forgive in order to move on despite what is written in many books or practiced in many programs, especially those of the 12 step variety. It is my belief that one must place the events in a box somewhere within their minds to move on. I call it "Letting Go". One can let go of a painful event without forgiveness and still move on. The trick is to "Let Go" and not repress emotions that may be painful. When we repress emotions, we become angry, resentful, jealous, depressed, stuck in the here and now as well as in the past. Worse yet, we become a victim. Feel it. Let it go. Move on.

I think many people get stuck in the past, because they think they must forgive first, before they can move on. Therefore, the forgiveness part keeps the struggle in the present. Who needs to have that sort of battlefield within their minds?

I am often told by others that they must "love themselves". What does that mean? Does it mean, one must place themselves and their well-being first? How does one love themselves? It is my belief that to love oneself, they must take care of the physical, emotional and spiritual self. Positive affirmations are a part of the solution. However, if one is not physically, emotionally and spiritually healthy, positive affirmations will not work for the long term.

Humans are great at justifying, rationalizing and over thinking situations. Something that is simple, we make complicated. There are no quick fixes in life, because as this site states, "it is about the journey". It is about managing everyday life, solving a problem, letting go and only then can we find a healthy mind.

Monday, April 23, 2012

Children Resided With Frank C and Mary A Maier in 1940

  • Children (7)
    Mary F MaierB: 1915
    Rita T MaierB: 1918
    Charles H MaierB: 1920
    Frank W MaierB: 1921
    Caroline S MaierB: 1928
    Katherine M MaierB: 1934
    Arthur L MaierB: 1937

Marriage Record of Frank Maier and Mary Agnes Heisse

Name:Mary A Hiesse
Spouse Surname:Maier
Spouse Gender:Male
Marriage Place:Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, United States
Marriage Year:1912
Marriage License Number:288536
Digital GSU Number:4140435

Frank Maier Child of Frank C and Mary A Heisse

Name:Frank Maier
Birth Date:1913
Birth Place:Phila, PA
Death Date:13 Dec 1913
Death Place:Philadelphia, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Age at Death:1 month 5 days
Burial Date:15 Dec 1913
Marital Status:Single
Father:Frank C Maier
Father's Birth Place:Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Mother:Mary A Heisse
Mother's Birth Place:Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
FHL Film Number:1429007

Saturday, April 21, 2012


Understand what freedom is and how it is achieved. Freedom is not the right or ability to do whatever you please. Freedom comes from understanding the limits of our own power and the natural limits put in place by divine providence. By accepting life's limits, and working with them rather than fighting them, will set us free. On the other hand, if we succumb to our passing desires for things that are not in our control, freedom is lost.

Friday, April 20, 2012


The almighty Vatican says the nuns spend too much time focusing on poverty and social issues and not enough time on abortion and gay marriage? The Bishops are told by the Pope to put those nuns back in their place. Let me say this clearly and slowly, "GO TO HELL POPE BENEDICT". You pompous ass who hides behind the walls of a palace and has no idea what the word poverty means. How dare you demean the nuns who have given up their lives in the service of God and you say, it is not good enough? At this moment, I am ashamed to be Catholic and I hope the American Catholics break away from the Roman Catholics. Throw enough money at the pompous ass and your marriage will be dissolved and you can go on and act as if you were never married, children or not. And let us have a little conversation about those find men known as priests, brothers, bishops and cardinals. They have raped and molested thousands of children and you turned your back. I will follow my God. The God that is loving and forgiving. Not the God of hate and wealth. No wonder we have religions that broke away from the Pope.

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Off the elevator and began the long walk down the long hallway. A child is running down the hallway coming in the opposite direction, Laughing. Excited. Happy.  Looking up as the child comes running towards me, OMG, it is her. Just as always imagined. Filled with anticipation. Closer and closer, the happy child runs. The child is not running to me but to a person walking behind me. It is not her. The child came out of the door beyond my door. Deflated. Defeated. Overwhelming Sadness.

No matter what is achieved in life will never match the loss experienced. Failure engulfs because failure it is.

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Julia Wisloski

Was the youngest child of Lucas and Eva Wisloski who was born in 1906 after the death of her father. Folklore states that Julia displeased her family by marrying someone whom the family did not approve. This information made it difficult to track Julia because she resided at home in 1920, but by 1930, she no longer resided at the 166 Roxborough Ave address. Years ago, I asked my own father about his aunt Julia. He told me that Julia was disowned by the family due to marriage or religion and like everything else in his family, it was not allowed to be talked about. Same rule apparently applied to the death of Lucas prior to Julia's birth. Julia is not interred in the family plot at Westminster as are her sisters and brothers along with her mother and sibling spouses.

I came across a marriage record of Julia Wisloski who married an Anthony Coppola in 1924. That explains why she did not reside home in 1930. However, there are still many unanswered questions such as why I cannot find Julia and Anthony in 1930 or 1940. Why was her older brother, my grandfather, John Wisloski allowed to marry a German Lutheran Marie Schroeder and not be disowned. Marie did not change her religion to Catholic. However, she did have her children baptized in the Catholic faith vs. the Lutheran faith. The name Coppola suggests that Anthony was Italian, therefore probably a Catholic. Was Julia disowned for marrying an Italian vs. Polish? Again that standard did not hold for my grandfather who was Polish and married a German.

It is my goal to search out Julia and Anthony and trace their whereabouts. Some questions may never be answered, but I never thought I would find my great grandfather Lucas, and I did after false leads and endless research. Julia is a puzzle to be solved.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

William J Gallgher II

Thinking about my grandfather today. It would have been his birthday. When I think of grandpop, I think of quiet strength and a man who loved life and lived with a passion. I was 20 years old when he died and I still remember his smile that lit up his entire face. Happy Birthday Grandpop.

At Play

Lucas Wisloski

After years of research and wondering the reasons behind what happened to my great grandfather, I finally discovered he was interred in St. Mary's on January 1, 1906. Along with Lucas is an infant also named Lucas who died a year before my grandfather John was born. My grandfather was born in 1904. The rest of the Wisloski Clan is interred in Westminster Cemetery which includes my great grandmother Eva who died 30 years after her husband. 
It is always nice to awaken by the sounds of birds singing their songs. Spring is really here. Yesterday, we made a stop in route to my son's house to buy two chairs for the balcony along with a window box and four Calla lily plants. This will begin my passion for gardening on a much lower scale. It will be balcony vs. house gardening. I did not realize until I got home that the four lilies I purchased had specific colors, two are yellowish orange and two are pink. Karma? Why did I chose four lilies with those colors? Bill asked me (joke) what I was going to call the lilies. My immediate response was Shaun, Nikolas, Ava and Bella. OK. Weird mind, I know. Interesting, all the same.

I love mornings where I can sit back and enjoy my coffee before the rush of the day. Taxes need to be done today followed by one project, one take home midterm, online discussion questions, two papers with professional journal references and two powerpoints and that is just school. I want to get up to see son #2 today. I also want to plant those lilies in the window box. Does not sound like a lazy Sunday to me. This is my reality until May 5th. It will be so nice to have my Saturdays back again.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Spiritual Progress Is Made Through Confronting Death and Calamity

I swear I just picked up this book and opened it to any page and this was the title. This guy from 94 CE known as Epictetus wrote some amazing stuff and whether it is Karma or Luck or God Or some Creature from Outer Space, why would I open a book up to this particular page on this particular day after last night? If someone has the answer, I sure as hell would love to know. Epictetus writes the following;
"Instead of averting your eyes from the painful events of life, look at them squarely and contemplate them often. By facing the realities of death, infirmity, loss and disappointment, you free yourself of illusions and false hopes and you avoid miserable, envious thoughts."

It does not matter how old your children get, a mother feels their pain. Even though a mother wants to fix it and make the pain go away, she knows she is helpless in many situations and can only stand by and offer words of comfort, a hug, send flowers, and remember. My son is taking this loss extremely hard and when he tells me how "unfair" this is, I can only answer "I know". "Hold on to each other and grieve", I said. It is the only way.

I left class early today and went to see my son who has a birthday next week and to play with my grandsons. As Bill played basketball with the older one, I pushed the younger one around on a swing hanging off of one of their trees. Hell. I even took a turn and swung in circles. Next weekend, we celebrate my Dad's birthday. It is a surprise. I think I will take the boys overnight or at least the one whose life is not filled with baseball. The older one has one hell of a sport's life.

There are many things which occur in life that I do not understand. I suppose I am not to understand them only to accept them.  Life is a journey and I am a prime example.  

Friday, April 13, 2012

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Andrew and Samuel Wisloski Burial Record

Click document to view.

Andrew Wisloski




Image Number



Events are Impersonal and Indifferent

I am kind of in a weird mood tonight. Actually, the mood has been lingering above my head all day. I hate when something is broke and I can't fix it. When I find myself in these weird moods, I like to turn to my favorite philosopher "Epictetus". I generally just open to any page and read. Today I read Events Are Impersonal and Indifferent. When considering the future, remember that all situations unfold as they do regardless of how we feel about them. Our hopes and fears sway us, not events themselves. In any event, however seemingly dire, there is nothing to prevent us from searching for its hidden opportunity. It is a failure of the imagination not to do so. But to seek out the opportunity in the situation requires a great deal of courage. There are other several paragraphs that speak to events, but I believe I got the basis of what it means. I ask myself the question, how do you stop missing someone? How do you stop missing an entire past life-style? People do it all the time and I know the quote unquote professional answer "Time". It takes time. We can neither hurry it along or stop it. Time is time. Nothing more nor nothing less.

I spent some time sitting on the terrace outside my room in Amalfi that overlooks the Mediterranean Sea. The sun felt good upon my face and I enjoyed how the sunlight danced across the water. I felt good. Alive. Every problem, every memory was hidden in my mind and all I could think about was the beauty surrounding me. Rome was fun. The sights in Venice were magnificent. But here in this magical place, I felt at peace with myself and the world. When it came time to leave, I felt sadness. When we flew back to London, I considered getting on a plane to Ireland and finding family and staying with them while working at a pub. It is a one hour flight from London to Dublin. I was so tempted. Forget about responsibility to others. Obviously, the practical Pat came back to the real world with the real mortgage, real job and real problems. So here I am looking out the window of a 10th floor Condo watching the white fluffy clouds float by in the blue sky. In the distance are trees and hills. Opportunity Epictetus says, I look towards that opportunity with anticipation.

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Police Adventure Plus Some

I finally completed the upload of our trip to Italy where we started in Venice and ended in Amalfi with stops in between. It was an amazing trip and one that will remain in my memory for the days of my life. I got to know my mother and sister better in those ten days. I recognized how alike yet different we are. I believe my mother and sister are two peas in a pod. After sharing a room in Venice, Marianne opted to get her own room in Rome then when we got to Amalfi, my mother got her own room. I was the orphan child left to sleep with whoever did not get their own room. One of the things we did on this trip was laugh and when I say laugh, we really laughed. Yes. There were times when we wanted to strangle each other but most times, we laughed and laughed hard. The second day in Amalfi, my sister and I went exploring down narrow alley ways and steps. We headed down the mountain through some towns looking for a place to eat. After what felt like a million miles with toes screaming, we decided to ask an old woman where we could eat. She directed us right back to where we came from. Amalfi! We decided to catch a bus back and when it came, we raced to get on board only to realize we had coins and to take a bus, one must go to the store and buy a bus ticket. Back to square one we go. Marianne buys the tickets and since we know the buses run on the hour we sit on a bench to wait. We see a police car across the street but pay no attention. That changed when the two officers got out of the car and began putting on bullet proof vests. As one was in the trunk getting a rifle, we spot the other one with his gun. Shit! What the Hell? Marianne calls over to me, let's get the hell out of here. The bench we were sitting on was close to a bar, so we were thinking those cops were waiting for someone to exit. Marianne kept saying, "I am not getting killed in any cross fire". We started to walk and fast. Screaming toes or not, we were getting out of there. As we dashed away, a car pulls up and this man whom we do not know asks us if we want a ride. We look back at the cops and hop into the stranger's car. OK, here we are in another country jumping into some strange guy's car. We tell the guy where we are headed and asked about the cops. He tells us they are special cops who probably received a tip and were waiting down the hill for the terrorist to travel down. WTF! We are dropped off at the bottom of the hill in Amalfi and make our way finally to a market place to eat.
Stay Tuned. More stories to come.

Monday, April 09, 2012

Back To The States

 Proof my mother does sleep though she would never admit it, while I sit close to my stomach virus sister. Five days later, I came down with her bug. Thanks for sharing.


Flight From Rome To London

Never have your sister tell you "how unwell she is", then have her sit in front of you on the flight to London. I poked her several times, before she told me "she was still alive".

Did We Have To Leave This Magical Place To Go Back To Rome?


My Drink, Her Drink

The Tomb Of St. Andrew. First Apostle of Jesus

Four Hundred Steps

We decided to walk the 400 hundred steps up the mountain to reach

 a cemtery that dated back to 1200 AD and anyone who knows me, knows I must find a
 cemtery somewhere. Along the way, we spotted a man shoveling cement into packs
 that donkeys/mules will walk up and through nbarrow alley ways all the way up steps.
 What would a walk up a mountain be without a few snap shots of what was directly below.
 I am still amazed how the trees and flowers grow out from the solid rock of the hills.
 These are the steps those three donkeys/mules disappeared up.
 I really cannot expand on what the hell this is as we walked up.
 My sister and mother were always a block or should I say staircase away.
 Yes. They all hang their clothes out to dry no matter how small the alley.
 Pictures from the market place down below. I am sure God did not create the water fountain
 breasts or the angels shooting out water from "I do not know what".
 As I mentioned before, everyone uses their roof tops as yards in Amalfi. This dog is sun bathing.
 Gardens grow on roof stops. We made it FINALLY to the top only to be told
 that the cemetery here was closed for the day but it was opened tomorrow. I decided
to create my own version of a tomb. So I picked out a stone wall and laid out. How do I look dead?