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Change Nov 7, 2012
Historical Places In East Falls Dec 15, 2005, 6 comments
Norristown State Hospital Building And Grounds Sep 1, 2008, 1 comment
Odd Fellows Cemetery May 11, 2007, 5 comments
Christmas Card Oct 25, 2012

Top Five

Norristown State Hospital Building And Grounds Sep 1, 2008, 1 comment
Historical Places In East Falls Dec 15, 2005, 6 comments
Change Nov 7, 2012
Odd Fellows Cemetery May 11, 2007, 5 comments
Top Five Posts Reviewed By You This Week. Nov 4, 2012

Office Worthy

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The Masks We Wear Nov 1, 2012
Abandon the Mask Nov 3, 2012
Norristown State Hospital Building And Grounds Sep 1, 2008, 1 comment
Historical Places In East Falls Dec 15, 2005, 6 comments
Top Five Posts Reviewed By You This Week. Nov 4, 2012

Happy Election Day!

It will be a truly happy day if the Republicans win. Just sayin.

Top Five Today

The Masks We Wear Nov 1, 2012
Abandon the Mask Nov 3, 2012
Post Sandy Oct 30, 2012
Chrissy's Confections Oct 30, 2012
A Boy and His Dog Oct 31, 2012

Top Five Posts Reviewed By You This Week.

The Masks We Wear Nov 1, 2012
Abandon the Mask Nov 3, 2012
Post Sandy Oct 30, 2012
Chrissy's Confections Oct 30, 2012
Potters Fields in Philadelphia

Abandon the Mask

"There's no art to find the mind's construction in the face."~ William Shakespeare

Babies' faces are wonderful not only because they're physically beautiful, but because they're absolutely candid. It is a rarity and a joy to look into a face that pretends nothing, hides nothing, and disguises nothing. Such faces are beautiful because they reveal wholeness. Few adults have such faces. And unlike babies, who are innocent because they lack experience and are yet untouched, adults may be survivors of brutal experiences. For some adults, candor and openness have been reborn because they were willing, over time, to abandon their masks one by one. Now that they aren't hiding anything, they don't have to prevent anyone from looking in. Because their insides match their outsides, their faces clearly reflect the wholeness that was restored to them. It is a privilege as well as a joy to see such clarity and freshness shining out of an adult human being. And it is evidence that renewal is possible.

Today, I will begin to remove the mask of perfectionism.

The Masks We Wear

Cover up our insecurities, self-doubt, failure and sadness. What better way to get through a day, than to hide behind a mask? We do not want anyone to see our pain, so we put on that smile. How many times has someone asked you how you were, and the immediate response was I'm good. Hey, I am even great!

What a lie.

The most precious thing about babies is they never hide behind a mask. If they are tired, hungry or in pain, they cry. They frown. They smile. They giggle. They laugh. When we look at a baby's face, what we see is exactly what we get. They are so genuine with all the innocence, yet untouched by the challenges of this world. I heard a quote about babies vs. adults. At the end of that reading, I wondered what it would be like to be that genuine once again. To show the entire world what we feel.

As we grow up, we learn to hide behind a mask. Most of us have several masks in which to chose from. Today, I had my professional mask on. When I came home, I took that mask off and replaced it with the mask of life is good, when in fact it felt a bit sad and lonely. I learned at a young age that certain emotions were acceptable, and some were not acceptable. We are a sum of everything we have learned through our lives.

Seven weeks of learning to set boundaries. Difficult to do. Even harder to maintain. The part I forgot was the horrible pain, and guilt that goes with the boundaries. I am told it gets easier. I want it easier now. Every part of my life, I have been setting boundaries, and trying not to cross over into other's boundaries. It is difficult. I know it will get easier in time, and the pain will fade as well as the guilt. It is just so hard now. I have to say what I mean, and mean what I say, and not turn back or else the boundary is compromised. I have to feel the hurt, and the guilt in order to get passed it. God Damn, no one told me how hard that was going to be. Do you know how hard it was to tell my boss "no" when asked to work 12.5 hours yesterday in order to teach a class? I said "no" (boundary set) but then came the guilt and the self-doubt. How many times I told myself I should have said "yes" even though I knew I would be fried today. How many times I thought I would be fired. How much self-doubt one can have just by saying the word, "no". Making a decision, then worrying if I just cut off my leg?

People pleaser. Caretaker. Mrs. Fix it. Yes. Hate confrontation. Help others before helping myself. Taking on someones emotions that clearly do not belong to me. I am learning. It is difficult and grueling, but I know that I will be more content, and those whom I love will gain a sense of self. It took 52 years to have an adult life. I have friends whom I go out with. I laugh. I cook if I want and more honestly never do. Stop at Whole Foods for a quick salad for dinner. Buy a glass of wine. Taste a new beer. Sleep late or rise early. Have visits with my grandchildren and children instead of thinking I was responsible for everyone and everything. Freedom.

So the next time you look into the face of a baby and he/she frowns or smiles, it is true and genuine unlike the frowns and smiles adults put on. How to have that feeling again. So pure. So precious. So real.

Speaking of babies, we have a new little girl who will be joining our family in March. The family is forever growing.
 

Harry Potter a.k.a Nikolas

Great costume.

Goodbye Len

We will miss you!

My Jeans, His Guitar

Post Sandy

Scary night. Winds were fierce. Walls rattled. Pictures fell off the walls. Lost power. Glad Sandy has left the area.

This was taken before Sandy made landfall. The 10th floor is not the place to be in a hurricane.

Son of John and Ellen Boland McLaughlin

According to the burial records at Westminster Cemetery, John was four months old at his time of death and the family resided at 5238 Pulaski Ave. John is interred in Section Eleven, Lot 335. Date of burial was July 12, 1920. Of interest, Ellen was my grandmother's aunt and youngest sister to my grandmother's mother, Agnes Bridget. My grandmother lost her mother at age three years old when Bridget died from a ruptured appendix in 1915. I heard a lot of folklore stories regarding Ellen and the death of her son. I was told she suffered a deep depression when her son died, and was even placed at Byberry. I cannot verify any of this information about Ellen, and so far I cannot find Ellen and her Husband in the 1920, 1930, or 1940 census records even though there is other evidence that they did reside in Philadelphia those years. I was told they only had one child. However, I cannot verify that information. It took several years and many sources to discover the information I can verify such as marriage records, social security death records, and the burial record of the child. My next step is to go over to Westminster Cemetery and have the burial record pulled to see if the parents are interred with the child. Of interest, all the other Boland children of John and Ellen Doherty Boland are interred in Holy Sepulchre Cemetery.

Marriage Record of Ellen Boland to John McLaughlin

Name:	Ellen Boland
Gender:	Female
Spouse Surname:	McLaughlin
Spouse Gender:	Male
Marriage Place:	Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, United States
Marriage Year:	1917
Marriage License Number:	375128
Digital GSU Number:	4141622

John McLaughlin, Husband of Ellen Boland

Name:	John McLaughlin
SSN:	197-07-0515
Last Residence:	19120 Philadelphia, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, United States of America
Born:	27 Sep 1894
Last Benefit:	19120 Philadelphia, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, United States of America
Died:	Mar 1979
	Pennsylvania (Before 1951)

Ellen Boland McLaughlin, youngest Daughter of John and Ella Doherty Boland

Name:	Ellen McLaughlin
SSN:	163-50-4127
Last Residence:	19120 Philadelphia, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, United States of America
Born:	28 Jun 1894
Died:	Oct 1977
Marriage	Pennsylvania (1973)

Sandy

The good thing about working on a Sunday is I am off on a Monday, and today is a good day to be off, as I have everything that once was on the balcony in the living room as a result of SANDY. I spoke with my oldest son last night, and he had to secure his front window. He texted a picture and like everyone else who had to secure a window his wife wrote a note to Sandy. Both my sister and parents have homes in Cape May and they had been securing those homes. However, they will not be able to prevent flooding. Wind advisory ranges all the way out to Monroe county where my sister has a house in the mountains. I wonder if she had to secure that one as well. Not much one can do surrounded by trees.

Some years back, I was caught in a hurricane in Florida. The neighbors had a hurricane party.

All we can do is wait and see what this one brings. I pray for all those who have to be out today and tomorrow will depend on the hurricane if I can get to work or not. Today, I will probably write two additional posts; I have some genealogy research information on my grandmother's youngest aunt and I want to write a post about dependability and responsibility. Why both are important from the view point of a therapist.

The Sun Also Rises

No matter what life throws at us, the sun always comes up. It may hide behind clouds, and we may not think it is there, however, it is always there whether we see it or not. Today, may seem dark. Tomorrow, comes the light. Hold on!

Shoes and Shoes

Ok. I must really be running out of things to write about, since this is my third post on shoes. Let's talk about this pair, shall we. I love shoes. I love shoes that are timeless and classic, as well as different and funky. These are a pair of great flats that go great with a pair of grey slacks, white sweater and pearl jewelry. Ok, so now you know how I went to work today. I like flats, because they are comfortable and easy to get around in. However, I like different with a taste of unusual and funky. The interesting thing about my taste in shoes is that it does not resemble to my taste in clothes. I wear clothes that are timeless and classic without frills. I work in a professional environment, so Fall/Winter = Suits with skirts, tights and boots to the knee. Spring/Summer = dresses without hose.
I am as comfortable in a suit, as I am in a pair of jeans and sneakers. Of course, I wear pants to work with heels, flats or ankle boots, but I stick with basic colors like black, brown, khaki and grey. In the winter, I may wear a sweater or blouse. In summer I may wear a tank with an overlay. I am fond of jeans and sweatshirts, or sweaters on the weekends. Hot Summer months = crop pants in the basic colors already stated adding a white pair.

My taste has never really changed. I always wore timeless and classic styles. I like to buy good clothes that last years. Pearls are my favorite gem stone, though I do wear gold and silver. I am not much into costume jewelry. I rather have a few good pieces of gold and silver, than a ton of costume jewelry. I shop at a few stores. Kohl's, Macy's and DSW. If I am in another city and see something interesting in a shop, I will purchase it. However, I never buy unless there is a sale. The only time I would buy something that is not on sale is if I really needed it for an occasion, or it blew me out of this world, which is seldom.

For twenty years, I wore scrubs and lab coats. When I went back to school, I traded that look for a more professional look. I still have those scrubs packed away somewhere. I keep telling myself, I need to give them away. I love science, but I figured a way to use it in my new field. I teach the Addictive Brain and Co-occurring Disorders. Neurobiology is fascinating as well as Genetics.

OK, you can wake up now:) 

Shoes

And yes I want to talk about them again. Hey, so its boring to read about my shoes:) Anyway, these shoes were given to me by my mother, and I wore them today for the first time. Fall = Suede. Unlike the shoes, I wore yesterday, these shoes did not have me limping, looked great with the dark brown slacks, lighter brown sweater and short green jacket. I would guess a three and a half inch heel though it was more solid, and easier to walk in. I do think I should have gone a half size smaller, as my feet did slide forward a bit. However, if I had socks as oppose to hose on I am sure the fit would have been tighter. I think these shoes would look great with jeans and I am very fond of ankle boots with jeans. I will be keeping these shoes.

Christmas Card

I had asked Bill to make up six special pieces of art work, so I could make individual cards for my three children and three grandchildren for Christmas. I will personalize each one and you can to. If you are interested all his art work is for sale, and he does gives discounts to those who ask. If you want to take a closer look at this picture or any other one, click the link.

I had my cards made for friends already. But for the six others, I wanted something different. He took a picture of a groundhog in Laurel Hill Cemetery and I asked him to make it into a Christmas/Winter scene as I thought the groundhog itself was very cute. I am not sure who this one will go to or what saying I will use. He has five more to do and I would like him to use some of his cat photos.

Shoes

Yes. I am actually going to talk about my shoes. They look so pretty on my feet and give a nice presentation when I am sitting, but try walking in these suckers all day, especially up three flights of stairs (constantly) to a third floor office, or across the grounds to the other building. Holy Shit! I feel crippled. By the end of this day, I was limping and not walking. Why did I buy four inch heels, when I never go past three inch heels? I am already 5 "7", so I do not need the height. They looked so pretty sitting there all alone in that box in the store. PERFECT, I thought. Well, if anyone is a size 8.5, they are all yours, because wearing them again is like jumping off the roof.

Enjoy the Ride

Tracking

Just want to reiterate a recent post explaining tracking. You can remove yourself from feedjit. However, I still can see who, what, when, where someone logged onto the site. It is behind the scenes not public to anyone, but me. It is a tracker device, I use for safety reasons.
http://ajourneyintothepast.blogspot.com/2012/10/how-it-works.html

If I Were a Butterfly

and you were small. I would have you climb on my back and we would fly away together.

Linvilla Orchards

Could these faces be any happier for the camera. I had to laugh!

It looked as if the orchard was a painful experience.

Could it be that the pumpkins in question were about 30 pounds each with the exception of the little one? Despite the pictures, we had a fun day eating funnel cake, pizza, Carmel apples and drank water for good measure. Nikolas did the maze, rode the train and played in the pumpkin land. Trish & I shopped for important things like Carmel walnut apple pie, apple cider, pepperoni bread, sauces and pasta and had fun looking at decorations.

Trish loves the clearance racks. Well, I guess we will see Linvilla again next October. And yes, Joey, I did get you the pie and cider.

Forbidden Drive

Fall walk on a beautiful afternoon down at Forbidden Drive. We started on the regular trails, before climbing the rocky terrain. We came across runners, hikers, dog walkers, bike riders, horse riders, and those like us who wanted to enjoy the sights and sounds of the woods in the Fall.

 The bridge that leads from the regular trail to the stone terrain seems so small until you stand up against it.

Steps made from Wissahickon stone.

Taking a picture of the photographer.

Walking along.

I walked these trails so many times throughout my life beginning when I was a small girl with my grandpop who used to always carry a big stick (to chase away wild dogs, he said) and where he taught me to fish. We may get older. People may die. Memories stay forever.